Is the BS in heaven?

BS is that small, usually stupid, often nagging problem that really does not have to be a problem. Hopefully your days are not peppered with them like a piece of salami.  Set the hook, let it run, then reel like crazy until they are flopping on the deck.  Time to reel.. 

I have been absent from the blog world for the last month. When we last visited we had slogged through a snow storm where the plow drivers were seemingly off for the day to watch the NFL at Buffalo Wild Wings (or their favorite bar). About that time both of the college students were done with classes and heading either home or to visit LI and then head home. On December 14, my DW’s step father in law passed away. Nine days before Christmas. He had been suffering from “Old Man’s Disease” and had pretty much decided he was done and stopped eating. We all attended that wake, funeral and burial.

On December 23, my DW’s mother went in the emergency room since she had not been able to urinate for four days. Back in the fall she was diagnosed with cancer and had “parts” removed. You really don’t need the gory details and out of respect to her and the family, I will gloss over the details.  Suffice it to say, the cancer came back with a vengeance. We were in and out of the hospital between December 23 and January 3 when she died in the hospital. Monday and Tuesday this week were the wake and the burial.

To say we are in shock is an undersatement. I took DS2 back to school this morning. DS3 does not return for a few more weeks. Over their Christmas break, the kids lost their two remaining grandparents. That sucks.

Christmas and New Years?  A complete blur.  I took pictures at Christmas, I will share them when we can get back to that happy place.

We would like to thank the staff of Four East at Ocean Medical Center in Brick, NJ for their excellent care and compassion of our mother (in law)

And we may have found a reasonably local church to attend. The Visitation Church in Brick, NJ provided the priest that said the Last Rites and the deacon that said the prayers at the funeral home. We found a connection to the message that both of them shared with us.

So my parents are in heaven as are hers. I hope they meet up and swap some stories.

Namaste

 

 

Funeral Saturday..

That title should discourage just about everyone from reading.  Saturday morning was the funeral for the Wheeling Jesuit University lacrosse player that was murdered in a fight after a night at the local bar near the college campus. Some of the details were discussed in the prior blog posting entitled Death of a Lacrosse Player.  As simple Google search will provide more information.

To say the morning was emotional would be an understatement. I took away a few lasting memories from the funeral and the repast. The president of the university said the funeral mass. He knew the player that had died and had spent most of the previous week with the family. He was very distressed by the events of the last week. Not as an educator and the president of the university, but as a human being that had lived through the tragedy.

The lacrosse community is a family. A small family with egos and such. Saturday was about celebrating the life of one of our own.  I hope to never be the parent at one of these services. 

The night before (Friday night) four of DS1’s college teammates came to our house for the night. They traveled from Ohio, Pittsburgh and Boston. These young men enjoyed an evening of a roaring fire, some beer and whisky and fellowship.  Saturday morning they were all up, showered and dressed and at the funeral (two hours away) on time. 

One picture tonight. This was sent to me by DS1. It was taken towards the end to the repast.

Namaste

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Last man standing..

Writers warning: The following blog contains introspection and thoughts that may challenge your ideals.  If you are looking for a light-hearted, sometimes humorous account of my life and the world around me, skip this blog.  The next one will (should) fit that need.  If you want to travel down the rabbit hole (Alice in Wonderland reference) with me, let’s go..

The last man standing, do you want to be?

The urge or need to survive is what has kept mankind churning along for quite some time.  This has been quite the week for me and my family. As detailed in previous blogs, five people that we know died in the last week. I would understand if my DW and I were 80 years old and we had a bunch of people that we knew die in February. It’s after the holidays, it’s the cold and flu season, the cold and grey can get people down and they just say the heck with it and stop fighting whatever infirmity they have.  I get it.

Monday I attended the viewing of one of my childhood friend’s (Uncle Dude) oldest sister. She fought cancer for 18 months including three rounds of chemo. The last month or so of her life was spent in home hospice. I experienced the family side of that experience with my mother back in 1999. Dying at home is not all that it is made out to be.  Thursday night, my DW and I attended the viewing of one of her uncles.  He had suffered with Alzheimer’s for the last four or so years.  Neither of these viewings had the emotion of Friday’s viewing and service. I would say that both families were ok with their loved ones being at peace.

Friday we attended the viewing and funeral of a person that we did not know.  The father of one of DS2’s classmates died suddenly at 56 years of age.  We (DW and I) cried. This was the first time this week for me, my DW, I think the same for her. We did not know the family. We went there to support our son whose’s friend lost a parent.  The viewing and the funeral took me back to the days surrounding the death of my mother.  As much as I tried to remain emotionally detached during the service, I failed miserably.  The man who died was a twin, the other twin is still alive. That must be tough.

The saving grace for me was that the viewing was followed by the mass which was followed by the cemetery followed by the repast. I did not have to make any decisions, just bear witness to someone’s life and the family that was left behind. It was good to see quite a few of DS2’s friends make the two-hour trip from school to support their friend. One of the nuns from the university made the trip as well.

Being the last man standing will require that you watch everyone you love go before you.  Does that mean you win? Good question.  I’m going to hang out as long as I can and make the most out of every day that I get.  I think that was the message from yesterday’s funeral.

And yes, there is a picture. Here are the college friends at the repast.

Namaste

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